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Case file

Empathy Gap

Filed under
Too Much Information
Also recorded as
Hot-cold empathy gap

The charge

We underestimate how much behavior changes across emotional or visceral states and how hard it is to understand people in a different state from ours. Calm selves make unrealistic plans for hot states, and vice versa.


How it operates

People simulate others and their future selves using their current state as the anchor. Because drives like stress, hunger, pain, or desire are hard to imagine from the outside, prediction errors follow.

Logged incidents

  1. Incident 01

    A team designs a cancellation flow while calm in a meeting room and underestimates how frustrated users behave when they are locked out of an account.

  2. Incident 02

    An executive commits to a harsh negotiation stance before the meeting but caves when the live social pressure arrives.

  3. Incident 03

    A founder promises they will not doomscroll investor feedback at night, then does exactly that in an anxious state.

What to watch for

Ask yourself: 'Am I making this plan from a calm state for a future version of me who will be tired, stressed, tempted, or angry?'

Recommended action

Use precommitment tools such as Ulysses contracts, defaults, and cooling-off periods. Scenario planning across hot and cold states improves forecasts.

Known associates

Source of record

en.wikipedia.org

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